Men you must find the courage!

Men- you must stand up! How is it that at the first sign of strength, you are cowering? And women- what is this nonsense I hear you saying? “We Women must allow men to be a man?"

I could never stop a man from being a man! How did men today get so fragile? It is some 40 years now since women began the journey to liberation. Some claim since this liberation, men no longer know how to be men and the family structure has been adversely affected. Quite frankly, women’s refusal to rule under a man’s authority is at the root of why a large proportion of men simply put are reneging on their responsibilities as men.

The dating pool today is tough because men feel their power and authority is being usurped by the independent, strong and aggressive women of today. I say RUBBISH! The argument is if you can do everything for yourself, what do you need me for? Some feel if women had learned to be content with the two pennies their husbands were providing, the family structure would be in a better condition and men would be still in the homes. Let’s think about this for a second though! What does my salary as a woman have to do with what the man was created to do?

God gave man dominion over the earth. In other words, man was given power that no woman could ever take unless he chose to give his power away. From the very beginning, man showed exactly how he intended to use his power when he was faced with the decision to eat the apple being offered to him by his wife, Eve. Instead of thinking about the special instructions he was given, to stay clear of that apple tree, he accepted his wife’s offer. When Adam accepted his wife’s offer, basically he was not behaving as the leader he was designed to be. He was allowing his wife to have dominion over him.

Today, we can see a similar pattern or trend in men today. Men are not showing good leadership period. When they are faced with change, rather than make the decision to face it head on, they choose to sulk in the corner or worse respond with abuse or become reckless. As it is now evident in our homes and communities.

Just because a woman makes a salary that rival that of a man’s, does this mean the man is not responsible for leading his family? We must revamp our thinking. On the other side of the mighty dollars is, he often substitutes his money for quality time, affection and showing love in the home- which are all ways men can show leadership. I do believe that this whole idea of a man not being trained to show leadership in the home began as far back as the early 18th century- perhaps even earlier. Every time we raised our young men and we had kings who sent them off to war, we were perpetuating values that were anti-family values.

Sometimes family heads were encouraged to leave the family for years. So this meant children were being raised for ions by women. Men were not also being properly trained and nurtured in how to be a good leaders by the nations in which they lived. When men returned from the wars they fought, so much time and memories were lost. What could they do to fill this gap? The interest of kings has never been to protect the family structure but rather their kingdoms. The reality is for centuries we have learned to live without our men playing the leadership role. His role in the home has been very one-dimensional and while we embrace this as a norm, at no point have we really found a way to narrow that gap. Kings and governments in actuality have done much to destroy the man by virtue of their desire to acquire lands and wealth.

All in all, the issue of men owning their role is not a new one albeit more men seemed to be more conscientious about their roles as family heads. If you do subscribe to the creation story, the man did not take responsibility for the decision he made back then in the garden and even now as women soar to higher heights men are still making excuses for why they have not taken more responsibility for their absence or lack of engagement in the home and society. Taking responsibility means finding courage to face yourself, vulnerabilities and the changes or expectations of your partner. Yes, I do agree it is alot! But remember- the man has been designated with the role of having dominion over the earth. Dear men, these changing times require that you adapt- maybe even morph a little. Either way, women need you to step up and stop making excuses for the poor fathers or mothers you may have had. AND LEAD as God has designed you to do. Make the choice to do as you should, even if you feel you have never had a good role model! Even if the woman is intelligent, or immature and flaunts her status, you must find the courage!

March 24th, 2022

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